This is continued from Part 1 of Lizbeth Rewatches Battlestar Galactica — 1978: 'Lost Planet of the Gods, Part 1,' subtitled (by me), Sweet Mother of Jesus, Stop Calling Them "Girls."



Rumor has it that the Lost Planet of the Gods episodes were actually three scripts that were cobbled together in a bit of a rush. Certainly the Baltar scenes look like they came from different episodes and the disease-of-the-week angle definitely looks tacked on.

Despite the rampant sexism in this part (most notably, rampant sexism from Starbuck) on the whole the episode isn't actually that bad. Okay, okay. I snark because I love. It's better than the Planet of the Bug People that ate the second half of 'Saga,' and we're getting into the mytharc pretty quickly.

So, it's time to keep score, peoples. In 'Lost Planet of the Gods, Part 1' we see:

• More Apollo-Starbuck subtext than you can shake a stick at. I'm beginning to think that the slashers rooted those stories in canon.  Yes. It was that blatant.
• Conclusive evidence that Serena is a Humolon
• Ample reason to put Starbuck down like the sexist, rabid dog he is
• Proof that Apollo is awesome, his little issues with his future wife-y-poo wearing a pilot's uniform aside
• That "lieutenant" isn't so much a rank, but a nice title that is handed out like candy to anyone who climbs into a cockpit
• The beginnings of  the "let's ignore Athena and maybe she'll go away" tactics from the writers
• Ed Begley Jr. kicking acting ass in this 5.5 seconds of screentime
• Boomer showing all the commonsense and brains of a turnip
• Tigh wondering if it's too late to transfer to another ship in the fleet before Adama gives him a heart-attack
• The desperate need to up Adama's meds. I hear from Laura that chamalla is the way to go here
• That sisters damn well can do it for themselves. In fact, they can do it so well, that maybe they could've saved the Colonies from being wiped out if they were allowed to be viper pilots, lack of training be damned.
• That the Cylons are, if possible, devolving to a lower life form, complete with lower intelligence
• The only person crazier than Adama is Baltar. Maybe.

And, so, class, what is our moral lesson from 'Lost Planet of the Gods, Part 1?'

Don't ever, ever, ever call a woman in uniform "girl" if she's armed, and knows how to fly an viper up your ass.

I give 'Lost Planet of the Gods, Part 1' a big Four Minutes of the bloodbath that would follow when 1978 Starbuck makes the fatally tragic mistake of calling 2003 Starbuck "a girl."

My ranting on this post got a little bit long over the *mumble mumble* weeks I wrote this. So, it's in two parts...

Well, here we are for yet another edition of Lizbeth Rewatches Battlestar Galactica — 1978.

Tonight's episode: 'Lost Planet of the Gods, Part 1'
Episode Subtitle: Sweet Mother of Jesus, Stop Calling Them "Girls"

Re-watching "Lost Planet of the Gods, Part 1" after many, many years of not watching it was a voyage in self-discovery.

As in, "My, how my tastes have changed."

Where once I had Starbuck-love, I now have Starbuck-meh.

Where once I was Boomer-who, I now am Boomer-awesome.

Where once I had Apollo-meh, I now have Apollo-love.

And yes, Adama is still as crazy as a shit house rat.

And as for the 1978 Battlestar's attitudes about women in uniform, Christ, where can I possibly start?

As some of you may (or may not) know, I decided to cut back on the Netflixing and rewatch the DVDs I actually own (as well as rewatch other people's DVDs).

At any rate, I had just finished rewatching Battlestar Galactica the new series up until 'Lay Down Your Burdens' (as a sidenote, if you re-watch the first two seasons back-to-back without a break, Season 3, especially 'Crossroads,' makes a whole fuckload of sense...but I'm getting away from the subject...)

Once I finished up the new Battlestar Galactica, I cast my eye around to find out which new series I was going to watch. Lo and behold, my eye fell upon the next series I owned. It just so happened to look like this:


Oh, Lordy me.  What's a girl to do?

Could I dive back into the the 1970s, cold war paranoia, Mormon recruitment tool that was, in fact, the original Battlestar Galactica with its reach-for-the-Emmy moments, lines that go *thunk* in the night, men with pretty-pretty hair, questionable physics, and plots that make no sense whatsoever?

Rest assured, good people, I resisted. I resisted hard. But, no! I had made up my mind. I would grit my teeth and march boldly backwards into my childhood when Battlestar Galactica was the one fandom that ruled my heart.

And so, I started right at the beginning, with 'Saga of a Star World.'  I should note that the title for the original 2-hour and 15-minute mini-series that kicked off the regular ABC extravaganza (which was broadcast over 3 nights) was not at all evocative of Star Wars. Really.

What can I say about 'Saga of a Star World?'



So, it's time to keep score, peoples. In 'Saga of a Star World' we see:

• The first sighting of a Humolon in the wild (Serena)
• Conclusive evidence that Apollo = manpain, regardless of Battlestar incarnation
• Proof that Starbuck always kills Zac. Frakking is optional. I think. I saw the way that  "Zac" was checking out "Starbuck," so I'm not 100% on the frakking part.
  
• The roots of the "throw Boxey and that damned daggit out an airlock" fan movement.
  
• A big ol' gapping hole where Laura Roslin desperately needs to be
  
• Cassiopea's significant presence almost making up for no Laura. Almost.
• Ample evidence that humanity's so stupid that it doesn't deserve to live.
• Much more ample evidence that humanity is still alive only because the Cylons are slower and stupider, no matter what the writers keep telling us
• Proof that Dirk Benedict can't emote for shit

And, so, class, what is our moral lesson from 'Saga of a Star World?'

"The military rools and the civilian government drools."

Read it, memorize it, love it, and live it, because you're going to get this lesson pounded into your head for the rest of the series.

I give 'Saga' a big Three Minutes of 1978 Baltar chewing the scenery while 2003 Baltar complains about how the other Baltar keeps blocking his close-up.

Just so you know? I'm doing this on a dare.

See, I was talking to a friend I met through fandom waaaaaaaay back in the day when there was no WWW and we only had Usenet to keep the fanwank flying and we got on the subject of shippers and shipping and our general frustration that sometimes that kind of thing gets in the way.

Then, just as we were about to break our own arms patting our own backs, we realized that, unh, we're not exactly innocent here.

So we got to talking about OTPs, or rather, our OTPs.

Then she dared me to come clean. In public. In front of all my present-day fandom buddies. There may have been some bribery of chocolate involved. I'm not sure. By the time we reached the triple-dog-dare level, I knew I was beat.

So here, with pictures, are my Top 5 OTPs (Ever!) from television.

No snickering, please.

( Top 5 OTPs from Television (With Pictures) )

So, talk dirty to me people.

Your Top 5 OTPs. Any television show. Any genre. Can be canon or completely fanon.

I promise not to laugh. It's not like I've got any room to do that, right?