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Note To Self: Do Not Read Scary Urban Legends Before Bed
Allow me to introduce Exhibit A.
Reading Exhibit A (hint: it involves psychotic killer clowns posing as really ugly clown statues) just before going to bed means that you will get 3 — yes, you read that right — 3 hours of sleep.
After which you will have a very creepy dream involving psychotic killer clowns hiding in your bathroom behind the shower curtain. This will come with creepy giggling sound effects, of course.
You will wake in a cold sweat at 2 ayem. It will take you five minutes to convince yourself that there are, in fact, no psychotic killer clowns in your bathroom, and that you should go back to sleep.
However, 5 minutes later, you will tell yourself that maybe you should check.
This will result in you checking all your locks, opening the shower curtain in your bathroom, looking in all your closets, looking under your bed, checking back and front halls, and questioning George the Amazing Lovebird about whether he'd seen any strange people that day (you stick your tongue out at him when he chirps something that sounds suspiciously like a yes).
You will go back to bed. You will close your eyes.
You will hear scary, scary noises.
This means turning on every light in the apartment and tearing apart the place (again) looking for psychotic killer clowns.
There are, of course, no psychotic killer clowns.
However, your kitchen faucet is dripping. This may account for scary, scary noises.
Back to bed.
Everything is calm. No more scary noises. No psychotic killer clowns in the bathroom or anywhere else.
However, you are now wide awake.
You then stay wide awake for *checks clock* three-and-a-half fucking hours.
It is now 5:30 ayem (more or less) and I am wide awake, exhausted, and very pissed.
Taking kava kava has not helped. I'm starting to think seriously of raiding the Nyquil so I can get some God-damned sleep.
*pitches temper tantrum*
Somewhere around mid-day tomorrow I'm going to zonk out and sleep for 12 hours straight. I know this.
*whams head against wall*
Nope. That hasn't worked either.
I believe this means the clowns have officially eated me. Or something.
Anyway, clearly I am not dead. I have, however, been fairly busy this week. (See![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
kurukami for details since he did all the work writing up the adventures.)
As for why I was stupid enough to read about psychotic killer clowns before bed...unh...I'm not gonna tell you. I just was. That's all.
Reading Exhibit A (hint: it involves psychotic killer clowns posing as really ugly clown statues) just before going to bed means that you will get 3 — yes, you read that right — 3 hours of sleep.
After which you will have a very creepy dream involving psychotic killer clowns hiding in your bathroom behind the shower curtain. This will come with creepy giggling sound effects, of course.
You will wake in a cold sweat at 2 ayem. It will take you five minutes to convince yourself that there are, in fact, no psychotic killer clowns in your bathroom, and that you should go back to sleep.
However, 5 minutes later, you will tell yourself that maybe you should check.
This will result in you checking all your locks, opening the shower curtain in your bathroom, looking in all your closets, looking under your bed, checking back and front halls, and questioning George the Amazing Lovebird about whether he'd seen any strange people that day (you stick your tongue out at him when he chirps something that sounds suspiciously like a yes).
You will go back to bed. You will close your eyes.
You will hear scary, scary noises.
This means turning on every light in the apartment and tearing apart the place (again) looking for psychotic killer clowns.
There are, of course, no psychotic killer clowns.
However, your kitchen faucet is dripping. This may account for scary, scary noises.
Back to bed.
Everything is calm. No more scary noises. No psychotic killer clowns in the bathroom or anywhere else.
However, you are now wide awake.
You then stay wide awake for *checks clock* three-and-a-half fucking hours.
It is now 5:30 ayem (more or less) and I am wide awake, exhausted, and very pissed.
Taking kava kava has not helped. I'm starting to think seriously of raiding the Nyquil so I can get some God-damned sleep.
*pitches temper tantrum*
Somewhere around mid-day tomorrow I'm going to zonk out and sleep for 12 hours straight. I know this.
*whams head against wall*
Nope. That hasn't worked either.
I believe this means the clowns have officially eated me. Or something.
Anyway, clearly I am not dead. I have, however, been fairly busy this week. (See
kurukami for details since he did all the work writing up the adventures.)As for why I was stupid enough to read about psychotic killer clowns before bed...unh...I'm not gonna tell you. I just was. That's all.
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Psychotic killer clowns!
GAAAAAAH!
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*accepts ice cream*
I have no idea what I was thinking. Srsly.
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And I guess you're not going to be watching Supernatural's Everybody Loves a Clown eppy anytime soon then huh.
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I hope you catch up on your sleep. Heaven knows I'll never sleep again.
(But I will not read that Snopes page. I *so* will not.)
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NOPE.
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And oooooo, Topsfield Fair! Good alternative. I dig the Big E more, because they've got Llamas and Alpacas (awwwww! fuzzy!) but Topsfield is a good time.
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*Hugs you*
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As for me, I keep falling asleep where I am and jerking awake. My circadian rhythm is now officially fucked. And I have to go back to work on Tuesday. *cries*
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*Hugs you* Did you manage to get in a nap today? I hope so!
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Floppy-haired Xander agrees.
I hope you get some sleep!
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Remember my make-up birthday story for you (to make up that Water Hold Me Down isn't even close to finished) that I warned you was coming and was going to double as my Xmas story?
That was why I nosing around Snopes.
Seriously, though. It really was for research. When I read it, it was a delicious shiver to read. Then I go to bed. Next thing I know? Psychotic killer clowns. Gah!
My Xander icon agrees with your Xander icon. Bad idea.
Of course I'm gonna use it.
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As for why I was stupid enough to read about psychotic killer clowns before bed...unh...I'm not gonna tell you. I just was. That's all.
I started Stephen King's It a day or two before my husband went on a business trip. It was shortly after we'd moved to Chicago and before our kids were born, so I didn't know anybody that I could talk to without a long distance phone charge. So I stayed up late reading and then I was terrified to go to bed. I woke up from a nightmare in the middle of the night, looked down and saw Pennywise's face staring up at me. I made certain to place the book cover side down from then on. When my husband returned and decided to read it, I made him do the same thing....
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*shiver*
After that, I read the rest of Pet Cemetery during the day. Gaaaaah!
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From which I only escaped after joining the traveling troupe of clowns.
We were there last night.
We just want to play a bit before we pounce.
Sweet dreams.
=)
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I assume the giggling was your idea?
*shakes fist*
Kaaaaaaahhhhhhhn!
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I would have freaked out, too. I hope you get some sleep!
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Holy cow it freaked me out. The giggling is what really was freaky. I thought the urban legend was creepy, but the dream really adds a twist to it.
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*dangles sleep medicine just out of reach maliciously*
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*mumbles incoherent curses*
*curls up on floor and stares at ceiling*
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And to think, all I had by way of creepy dreams was dream of coming out of my bedroom and finding my younger brother randomly in my apartment.
He cleaned my balcony for me.
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I'm barely awake right now.
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Seriously, clowns *are* creepy-scary. EeeeEEEeeee!! I hope you catch up on your sleep and have no clown dreams whatsoever.
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I may have to medicate myself with Arrested Development.
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LMZ
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GAH!
Need sleep...
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And--branches outside the window -- those bothered me after watching The Birds when I was like 8 or 10. Hmmm. I *always* watched late night horror movies. No wonder I am me.
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LMZ
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I've not been sleeping at all well all week, so I know what you mean; hope you get a better sleep when next you try.
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And when I was kid, I watched the Hitchcock movie The Birds and could not sleep with all the lights off for *years* - I was convinced that there were birds sitting in all the dark areas of my room and I had to sleep facing the light from the door.
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Disturbed by this, she closes the door (without properly latching it again) and not five minutes later it opens. Disturbed by this, she runs to the bedroom, leaps onto the bed (lest the armoire monster who is hiding under the bed in wait for her grab her), and calls to ask if I'll be home late.
We have since named the monster Rex and I insist he's a pet. She is still undecided.
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Am I evil for telling you that this kind of thing rarely spooks me? I've never read a Stephen King book that had any effect. "Ghost Story" however, had me terrified.
Single scariest things for me - hands down - "The Collector" by John Fowles and "The Judas Child" by Carol O'Connell. Clowns, not so much.
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*cough*
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Creepy.
Totally identify. There is nothing worse than late-night heebie jeebies.
Particularly at 3 am in the morning. Don't know what it is about that time - but for some reason it promotes panic.
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