liz_marcs: You Know That This Means War (Bugs_Bunny_Not)
liz_marcs ([personal profile] liz_marcs) wrote2010-02-12 03:30 pm

Have I mentioned that geese are also evil?

I may have mentioned in the recent past that swans are teh ev0l.

I hope I have mentioned that barnyard geese can be equally evil.

Behold! Pro-kayak angler Drew Gregory will now demonstrate just how evil barnyard geese can be. (Yes, I laugh at other people's pain. Why do you ask?)





I can hear you out there. At some point after the laughter, you're going to say, "Hey! She hasn't posted crap in a month and when she does she posts a video of a pro-kayak angler getting his ass kicked by a goose.

Well, I've been busy doing the following:

  • Going to the gym and doing Wii FitPlus

  • Writing my story for the [livejournal.com profile] apocabigbang

  • Watching by Adventures of Brisco County Jr. DVDs because I desperately need to shut off my post-work brain a little bit

  • Zooming around in lurker mode on ElJay



Which means that I have not written or posted the following:

  • Doing my cardio at the gym while barefoot. And how you can do it, too!

  • A Review of the Awesomely, Hilariously Snarkalicious Wii FitPlus (And why people with body dysmorphic disorders should probably stay the hell away...)

  • Do Not Call Italians "Guidos" If You Want to Live (and Other Reasons Why the Cast of Jersey Shore Needs to Die) — Rumor has it there's a new season and that they're coming to Revere. Much as I hate that show, hate that cast, and hate the fact that they made ethnic slurs against Italians "cool", I'm almost hoping this will happen. Because the first "Guido" that comes out of these chuckleheads' mouths will end in the locals getting together to set fire to whatever house they're living in while they're still in it. I'll volunteer to bring the makings for s'mores when that happens. Low class, meathead motherfuckers.

  • Pointing Out the Obvious: If I'm Posting My Thinky Thots in My Own Journal, I'm Not Derailing You in Yours (I would think obvious post would be pretty damn obvious, but not so! Apparently. There are now rules about when you can post your own thinky thots in your own journal without being accused of doing something or other or being something or other, even if you innocently did it wholly unaware that you were supposed to wait a little while before posting your thinky thots. Or better, not posted your thinky thots at all! Even if you weren't aware that you weren't supposed to be thinking thinky thots! Say what? Does someone have a Xeroxed handout or something? Because these rules look really, really wrong to me.)


Why have I not written the above? As you may have noticed, lack of time, busy at work, busy with a fanfic, and I really don't feel like dealing with overwhelming wank about what I am and am not allowed to write in my own damn journal any time I damn well feel like it or why it is not fucking okay to call Italians guidos.

Now that I've mentioned it, I'm sure there'll be wank anyway. Which I'm going to ignore. Because I can.

Look, before you wank, just watch the evil goose attack the fishing kayaker again, okay? It'll help with your (and my) blood pressure to know that we can agree that the video above is just some funny shit.
damned_colonial: "Physical Culture: The magazine of health" circa 1910. (physical culture 1)

[personal profile] damned_colonial 2010-02-12 09:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Ooh, I'm interested in hearing about the barefoot thing.
guiltyred: (FSM - Ramen)

[personal profile] guiltyred 2010-02-12 11:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Brisco County Jr. is love! :3

And omgkillergeese!!1!1!! XD I must now post that video to warn moar peoples!
artimusdin: (Chuck Norris - Time)

[personal profile] artimusdin 2010-02-13 03:21 am (UTC)(link)
... is it wrong that, after I stopped laughing at him, the first thought I had was "... nice ass you've got there buddy *leer*"? Because that's totally what it was. <3

[identity profile] ffutures.livejournal.com 2010-02-12 09:20 pm (UTC)(link)
I've never heard of him before and probably never will again. But that attack is going to be stuck in my memory for a LONG time to come...
Edited 2010-02-12 21:20 (UTC)

[identity profile] liz-marcs.livejournal.com 2010-02-12 09:31 pm (UTC)(link)
You got to admit, that is hilarious, no?
ext_1880: (Default)

[identity profile] lillian13.livejournal.com 2010-02-12 09:35 pm (UTC)(link)
See, this is why you Do Not Taunt Happy Fun Goose. The goose thought he was getting food, and when none was forthcoming....smack!

I've always agreed that geese are evil, evil creatures. *nods*

[identity profile] liz-marcs.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 01:04 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I suspect that showing the goose the fish was part of what pissed the goose off...

[identity profile] rileysaplank.livejournal.com 2010-02-12 10:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Pointing Out the Obvious: If I'm Posting My Thinky Thots in My Own Journal, I'm Not Derailing You in Yours (I would think obvious post would be pretty damn obvious, but not so! Apparently. There are now rules about when you can post your own thinky thots in your own journal without being accused of doing something or other or being something or other, even if you innocently did it wholly unaware that you were supposed to wait a little while before posting your thinky thots. Or better, not posted your thinky thots at all! Even if you weren't aware that you weren't supposed to be thinking thinky thots! Say what? Does someone have a Xeroxed handout or something? Because these rules look really, really wrong to me.)

And here was me thinking the rules were as simple as "Your journal, your rules.".

[identity profile] liz-marcs.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 01:08 am (UTC)(link)
It's one of those odd things that kind of cropped up on my radar. You know how there are various Fail!Eruptions that happen in fandom, and issues get raised (and I agree, should get raised) about why such-and-such was a Fail.

Well, there apparently is a feeling among some people who are otherwise well-meaning and of good conscience who seem to think that it's possible to derail an Internet conversation if you post a tangent with think-y thoughts in your own journal, even if you're not involved in the original conversation.

Think about that. Apparently Internet fandom is sooooo small that it's just not possible to more than one important conversation or more than one discussion about series issues at a time.

Yeah, my head hurts right now.

[identity profile] shadowkat67.livejournal.com 2010-02-12 11:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Ahhhh...I missed you and your sense of humor, quite a bit. ;-)

And may I just say...ROFL! I laughed so hard during that video.
And then again at the rest of your post. Word on the whole Jersey Shore Guido phenomena, that I've been attempting to blatantly ignore.

Really needed a good laugh today. Thank you.

[identity profile] liz-marcs.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 01:16 am (UTC)(link)
Glad the laughter cheered you up! Right now, my head is about to explode and I needed the laugh myself.

The thing is, it's a very, very small subset of Italians who think "guido" is at all acceptable.

95% of Italians just about everywhere else? Nooooot so much.

I don't even want to talk about what happened on an message board when the issue of Jersey Shore Came up and a bunch of us with Italian ethnicity in our background were all, "This is not okay" and we were roundly ignored or told to get a sense of humor. *roll eyes*

The good news is, sooner or later these mooks will disappear off the radar (or be killed if MTV actually renews the show and send them to Revere) and the word "guido" will return to its rightful place as an ethnic slur. Until then, I get to endure all the explanations in the world why it really isn't an ethnic slur and why it's perfectly okay to call me and Italians in general a bunch of guidos because those people on Jersey Shore do it all the time and they're Italian, too, right?

NO! NO IT IS NOT OKAY! THOSE PEOPLE ARE IDIOTS! YOU DO NOT GET TO CALL ME A GUIDO! EVER!

*pant, pant, pant*

I may need to write that rant someday after all. Maybe if MTV actually does renew the series or actually starts to film it. Until then, I just want it all to go away.

[identity profile] shadowkat67.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 05:15 pm (UTC)(link)
You could write the rant in your lj and just either filter it or put it behind a cut tag - entitled "rant", everybody else does that. Or so I've noticed. Although...I've also noticed that whenever I write rants, all I do is rile myself up. So maybe not.

"Guido" - is a word that I have never really heard until this year. Which is odd considering I was raised with Italian-Americans. My best friend when I was a kid was Italian-American (South Philly- was Italian and Irish and Welsh). And as an adolescent? Also a lot of Italian-Americans - in KC. And I currently live in Little Italy, Brooklyn. Most of the people I work with - Italian American. Never ever heard anyone use that racial slur. Until the Metro did this piece on "Jersey Shore" and "Guidos". I remember thinking, Huh? Then OMG...what are you doing, perpetuating another negative stereotype about Italian-Americans, as if the mafia one wasn't bad enough? And is this just a New Jersey thing? Reality shows...with the possible exception of Project Runway, Changing Rooms/Trading Places, and American Idol and their ilk...are just evil.

[identity profile] kurukami.livejournal.com 2010-02-17 12:57 am (UTC)(link)
We could always hope that Whitey Bulger feels the need to come out of retirement, kill the Jersey Shore cast, and then get arrested by the FBI on his deathbed. *grin*

[identity profile] smhwpf.livejournal.com 2010-02-12 11:42 pm (UTC)(link)
That is fabulous. Laughed lots. But drunk. But I think it would still be funny shit sober. Good to see you're still around!

[identity profile] liz-marcs.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 01:16 am (UTC)(link)
It's funny shit sober and with a screaching headache!

Trust me...

[identity profile] slashaddict13.livejournal.com 2010-02-12 11:48 pm (UTC)(link)
Hahahahaha!!! Oh no!!!!! That poor guy!

Really, geese are terrible. We live right on a pond and the Canadian geese come by every spring to graze on our yard. We have to keep chasing them off the grass or we end up with goose poop everywhere and before we fenced in our yard, we would have drowned goslings in the swimming pool. Now that the yard is fenced in, we only have to keep chasing them until they have their babies. They are mean, mean creatures and the hissing sound is just terrible!

The funny thing is that when we travel and see flocks of geese, there are often lots of people taking pictures of them. I love to take pictures but I have absolutely no desire to take pictures of the geese.

I've missed seeing your posts but I'm glad that you're doing things for yourself. It's good to do that. :)

[identity profile] liz-marcs.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 01:18 am (UTC)(link)
I think the poor guy may have had it coming because he kept showing the geese the fish he caught. If I was a goose, I think I might kick his ass for not giving it to me, what with him having a fish in his hand and all.

The funniest bit about the video? The goose's hiss sounded like it was laughing after the guy got dumped in the water.

My dad told me about this video, so I had to dig it up to see for myself.

[identity profile] dr-pipe.livejournal.com 2010-02-12 11:49 pm (UTC)(link)
re pointing out the obvious; huh? I don't think I've heard of these rules. Perhaps I'm missing something obvious because I've been at work for 8 hours? Some new _fail inspiring someone to make up some "rules," I assume? If so, someone you know personally or have some sort of respect for? Otherwise, I don't get why they would even be worth mentioning?

[identity profile] liz-marcs.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 01:21 am (UTC)(link)
It's one of those things that I spotted floating around on the edge of my FList a few days ago that made me go, "Hunh?"

It's popped up again, and it appears there are a couple of people on my FList who appear to be buying into this whole idea that it's possible to "derail" a conversation by posting in your own journal, even if you don't get involved in the original conversation.

Yeah, I'm kind of sputtering at the breathtaking arrogance of that.

[identity profile] ficangel.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 01:43 am (UTC)(link)
I think I'm the only person on the planet who has nothing but pleasant experiences with geese. (My grandmother had a flock. They were like dogs.)

Pointing Out the Obvious: If I'm Posting My Thinky Thots in My Own Journal, I'm Not Derailing You in Yours (I would think obvious post would be pretty damn obvious, but not so! Apparently. There are now rules about when you can post your own thinky thots in your own journal without being accused of doing something or other or being something or other, even if you innocently did it wholly unaware that you were supposed to wait a little while before posting your thinky thots. Or better, not posted your thinky thots at all! Even if you weren't aware that you weren't supposed to be thinking thinky thots! Say what? Does someone have a Xeroxed handout or something? Because these rules look really, really wrong to me.)

This. All of fucking this.

[identity profile] lee-rowan.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 02:04 am (UTC)(link)
Um..

ROTFL!

If Mr. Gregory is going to make courtship overtures to the gander--send off friendly vibes, make soothing noises, and offer him food (hey, it was too big, but it's the thought that counts, right?) then why is he surprised when the goose thinks he wants to be ... um ... "befriended?" That goose wasn't flying in his face in an attack--looked to me like he was trying to mount him. Waterbirds aren't big on foreplay.

Wild animals aren't evil. They aren't marching up the freeway attacking humans. When we go into their territory, that's provocation. Or in this case, maybe flirtation.

My mother-in-law lives on a river, and gets geese, deer, etc. all the time. It does get messy, but boy, is the grass lush and green!

[identity profile] auntyk.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 03:54 am (UTC)(link)
I look forward to the time when you can post about the barefoot running and the wii fit...on top of your 'normal' posting

[identity profile] a2zmom.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 06:04 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I saw something about that not being allowed to post one's own crap in one's own journal also. Many people think the world revolves around them. It doesn't.

[identity profile] iyalode.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 07:54 am (UTC)(link)
I'm actually still bemused this is a profession, I mean Pro kayak angler! The fact they've managed to split it via which craft you float about in just hits my funnybone.

Makes me wonder. We all know the motorised/kayak peeps are like Montagues & Capulets. But I bet they both hate the hovercraft dudes.

[identity profile] hrafn.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 02:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Notice the goose didn't attack until he insulted them! "Stupid things are going to get hooked." Or perhaps the gander was angry that the man kept offering stupid inedible things as though they were food.

Oh, I laughed. I love how whoever put that video together gave us the attack scene /three times/!! And the gloating sounds from the goose afterwards :) That was totally a "Yeah, I'm cool, you're a loser," cackling (I've heard that many times, anytime one goose thinks it's got something up on someone else).

I was attacked by a domestic gander (part of my family's flock) once: I was 6, he was with his flock which included some goslings, and I tripped and flailed in a way that must have looked to him like I was posing a threat to his family. So he rushed me and I fell down. But mostly the geese preferred to ignore us; they were a lot less tame than the chickens.

*goes to watch dude falling out of kayak again*

[identity profile] seadragonlady.livejournal.com 2010-02-13 03:31 pm (UTC)(link)
As someone who was attacked by geese every morning at the bus stop as a young child I have personal experience that geese are evil. They should all be Christmas lunch!

[identity profile] texanfan.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 12:17 am (UTC)(link)
It's very good to hear from you and I look forward to reading your fic. I've got to check out this apocabigbang, too many great people are writing in it.

I am, sadly, not in the habit of writing thinky thots in my lj because I a) don't have many thinky thots that other people aren't 1) better informed on 2) more eloquent in expressing and b) I'm pathetically lazy. Unfortunately, this means I have no idea what your talking about regarding restrictions on same. What have I missed/ignored?

[identity profile] othercat.livejournal.com 2010-02-14 02:08 am (UTC)(link)
...I have not been able to see videos on eljay for a while now...link?

ETA: fixed the problem.

GEESE ARE EVIL
Edited 2010-02-14 02:41 (UTC)

You Have Been Nominated at Absence of Light

[identity profile] velvetwhip.livejournal.com 2010-02-21 11:16 pm (UTC)(link)
You've been Nominated at The Absence of Light Awards!



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[identity profile] jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com 2010-02-27 07:36 pm (UTC)(link)