liz_marcs | This is How You Lose Hearts and Minds: One Murder at a Time

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This is How You Lose Hearts and Minds: One Murder at a Time

It's all over the Web by now that Dr. George Tillman was murdered in church today.

Yes. In church. In front of his wife, who was in the choir, and in front of his fellow parishioners.

WWJD, indeed.

ontd_political is all over it.

Be sure to read the comments. There's some important information in there, including comments from a couple of Dr. Tillman's grateful patients. These were desperate men and women who didn't want an abortion, but needed to have an abortion because carrying to term would result in a dead woman, or a fetus so riddled with birth defects or genetic disease that if it wasn't going to be born dead it was going to die shortly thereafter in unbelievable pain.

Look up anencephaly and harlequin fetus as prime examples. I dare you to keep down dinner when you do. (No. Not linking to definitions, because it's triggering on a massive, massive scale.)

Their testament to Dr. Miller's compassion and kindness, to the professionalism of him and his staff, to the fact that this brave man was willing to help them in their hour of need when no other doctor would, is a fitting epitaph for a man whose epitaph was written too soon.

But I'm not going to talk about it, and instead let the information talk for itself.

Because this, this right here, is how you turn people against you. You do it one murder, and one act of terrorism, at a time.

This is how people see you for what you really are.

See, it's not even a bet that it's going to come out that the alleged shooter is connected to Operation Rescue.

Not. Even. A. Bet.

I know these people. I know these people from waaaaaaay back.

I suppose I should thank 'em, because they're the reason why I'm militantly pro-choice today.

Too bad people had to wind up dead for me to see the light, right?

It may surprise you that once upon a time I was anti-abortion.

I know, a total shocker, what with me waving the People's Republic of Massachusetts Flag Signaling Unapologetic Progressivism.

However, I was a Catholic School student starting from the fifth grade. Do you seriously think that any Catholic School student is not going to be anti-abortion? Really? I may have gone to a fairly liberal Catholic School, but it wasn't that liberal. Pro-choice was not an option, if you get my meaning.

You really think we didn't get to know all about Randall Terry and Gary Bauer before anyone else did?

Oh, shit yeah. We got to know all about them in our little Catholic School classrooms, and we're talking early middle school classrooms, not high school classrooms. Complete with dead fetus pictures. My brother and I are still scarred by that. And we both, to this day, get unreasonably angry when we see anti-abortion protesters waving those damn signs.

It doesn't help that even a little knowledge of biology pretty much tells you that those pictures are selling a lie. Because a first trimester fetus does not look like those pictures. (Don't worry. This links to the Mayo Clinic site about fetal development.)

But that is another argument for another time.

Even to my anti-abortion believing self, Terry and Bauer were still scary motherfuckers. When those two dudes were on a roll in front of people who agreed with them, there was some ugly spew coming out of their mouths. Ugly enough that even semi-brainwashed Catholic School girls would look at each other with "What the Fuck?" painted across our faces.

Even back then was as clear as the noses on our faces: These guys did not like women very much. They didn't trust them. They didn't think they were very smart. And they were damn well sure that women did bad things just for shits-and-giggles, while poor, long-suffering men had to put up with the bad things women did to them.

Women, in their twisted reasoning were evilly despotic in their rule over men, while still being the weaker sex incapable of deciding what to shoes to wear that day.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the Leading Lights of the Pro-Life Movement. You may weep now.

Considering all of us Catholic School girls were at that age where the boys were playing "grab-a-boob" in the school halls and the girls had taken to stabbing them with pens and drawing blood out of self-defense, this did not sound like any kind of reflection of our reality at all.

See this? This right here? This is where the cracks form and the doubt creeps in, and you realize that all the big movers and shakers in this anti-abortion movement look a whole lot like men.

Or more specifically, men who don't trust women and aren't shy about saying so.

Since those early days, Bauer and Terry have slightly modulated their public statements (only slightly), and a couple more female faces are serving as a front, but they haven't much changed their spots.

Trust me when I tell you: At the beginnings of their respective infamous careers it was a whole lot worse.

So it really shouldn't have been a surprise, what with Bauer and Terry shouting some pretty ugly shit at the assumed-to-be-converted, the violence against medical personnel and patients started happening.

And by the way, that link to anti-abortion violence does not even get into the harassment and threats the medical providers have to put up with every day. It does not even get into the harassment that women have to put up with every time they the use a women's health center, whether it be to get an abortion or just to get a damn pap smear they could actually afford because they have lousy insurance or no insurance at all.

Yet, despite the ugliness of their words, more than a few of us Catholic Girls managed to convince ourselves, "Well, they don't speak for everyone. Not everyone is like that. Some people are genuinely well-meaning. And hey, we all know kids who were adopted into loving homes, right?"

This reasoning, by the way, completely misses the point of pro-choice. Going through with the birth and giving the resulting baby up for adoption is still a choice. No one is running out into the street and randomly grabbing pregnant women and forcing abortions on them. And no one, not even people who are pro-choice, are at all in favor of forced abortions. No one is even rooting for anyone to get an abortion as a general policy (although individual cases may vary).

It also misses another point: Any child born after Roe v. Wade who was given up for adoption is still a child of choice. The legality of abortion, or even the lack of it, came very little into play in the birth of that child, if at all.

See? Your conscience says abortion is wrong and you go through with the birth and give that kid up for adoption, it's your choice. If for various reasons you can't go through with the birth (your reasons are immaterial), it's still your choice.

How hard is this to understand?

Well nigh impossible it appears.

Anyway, that's still getting away from my point.

The point being: How I Figured Out that Anti-Abortion People Shouldn't Be Given Any Power Over Anyone. Ever.

Fast-forward a number of years. All those words of hate from Terry and Bauer have been swirling in my brain for awhile now. And the more I think about it, the more it bugs me.

Then I think about this priest I know. Let's call him Father T.

Father T is a good guy, a good priest even. The kind of priest who is everything a priest should be. He's kind. He's compassionate. He makes the time for even the least of his flock. He's always there to help you out.

He's a pacifist, for Christ's sake.

And he protests the local Planned Parenthood every morning with his peeps from Operation Rescue right there on Main Street.

Okay, you tell yourself. Terry and Bauer are fucknuts to the nth degree, but how bad can Operation Rescue be if Father T is okay with them?

Until the violence against abortion providers begins, and the local Boston stations decide to cover the controversy.

Hard as this is for some of you to believe, Tom Bergeron used to host a mid-afternoon news/chat show called "People Are Talking" on local Boston television, and he was good at it. In fact, Bergeron was all over Boston television and radio in soft news formats.

Anyway, one of Bergeron's shows involved anti-abortion violence. One of his guests was Father T, who was there in the role of chosen spokesperson for Operation Rescue.

Bergeron fielded what I'm sure he thought was a softball question to a priest, "What do you think of the violence against abortion clinics?"

After some thought, Father T gave a most horrifying answer. "I don't approve, but I understand that sometimes it's necessary to stop the slaughter."

Cue Bergeron's mouth dropping open and at an utter loss for words. Cue the entire audience of mostly women sucking in a sharp breath that hissed, whether they were anti-abortion or pro-choice.

Ladies and Gentlemen, your local pacifist Catholic priest who right about then started looking damn well like a monster.

That, right there is where your brain breaks and you start taking a very long look at the anti-abortion rhetoric. Right there is when you start comparing the movement's actions versus their words.

And believe me, I looked long and hard, and thought long and hard about it. And in every statement, and every word no matter who said it, I could hear Terry's and Bauer's disdain women, and Father T's the barely disguised threat of violence against women who didn't toe his line.

Make no mistake: I did not come to this pro-choice stance easily or happily. I came to it out of sheer self-defense and in defense of the women around me, even for those women who disagree and would call me a depraved murderer to my face for simply being pro-choice.

This pro-choice stance has caused friction with my family, and the abortion debate remains the one subject that's never, ever discussed. Every time we try it ends in screaming and tears. So, in the name of family harmony, we agree to not agree and say nothing at all.

Ironically enough, it's my mother who's at the opposite extreme. Both my brother and my father fall in the mushy middle, I think. Don't like it. Don't approve. But then again, they're not women, so what the hell do they know? So, let's throw in "it should stay legal" and leave it at that.

Word of warning here: I've got the work week from hell coming up, so I may or may not respond. Not because I don't give a shit, but because I just don't have the time.

Also, you're not going to convince me that I'm in the wrong here. If years of Catholic School didn't do it, and if my mother can't do it, and if debating back and forth with myself on the issue for years didn't do it, you sure as hell aren't going to succeed.

So think on that if you're tempted to let loose both barrels.

Also: Any abusive comments to myself or any other responder will be screened and reported. So if you're going to disagree, make damn sure you're polite about it. And even if you do agree, threats of violence is going to land you in the same hot water.

I'm biased, and I'm not afraid to show it.

ETA: I knew it. I knew it. I totaly called Operation Rescue bobbing up in Dr. Tillman's murder like a bloated corpse.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and history on the subject. I'm still reeling from the announcement of Tillman's murder, but also not surprised at the suspect arrested.

Justice Ginsburg was quoted in an article earlier this month that she wished that rather than Roe v Wade, the case of Susan Struck v. Secretary of Defense had come before the court; it would certainly have shaped the discussion differently, I believe. (Some details on that case can be found here, about 1/3 down the page, after the ad.)

And I agree with you Any child born after Roe v. Wade who was given up for adoption is still a child of choice. The legality of abortion, or even the lack of it, came very little into play in the birth of that child, if at all. but would expand that statement slightly more -- every child born after Roe v Wade is a child of choice. My wife and I have three of them, because of choice.

Peace, Liz, may your week go easier than you anticipate.

Thank you for this post.

Another brave man died.

These are the same kind of thugs -- exactly the same -- who set fire to girls' schools in Afghanistan and bar the doors. There is no difference except in the minor details.

Here's a great editorial:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/shannyn-moore/christian-fundamentalist_b_209521.html

The Attorney General has sent US Marshals to protect women's health clinics. We have a real President.

I'm a man, and I'm also very pro-choice. Regardless of whether or not anyone agrees with me, and regardless of whether or not my opinion counts anyway, this story is FUCKING HORRIFYING.

The amount of hell that Dr. Tillman had to go through for decades just to provide a necessary and legal medical option for suffering women and families? Constant death threats. Shootings. Sabotage and tampering at his clinic. Hounded by the local DA.

It's just sickening to me, and you're absolutely right. This is terrorism. This is scaring people into following your beliefs. After today, there are apparently two clinics in the entire country that will perform late-term abortions. TWO. In the entire country.

What happens if those two clinics get too scared to continue? Where will the women who would otherwise die or whose children would suffer in unimaginable ways go? I guess they're just going to have to die.

It's sickening. I really don't know how to say anything other than that, and I find myself feeling truly ill when I hear the fence-sitting bullshit responses by various groups. "Oh any death is a tragedy, so we're very upset about this."

No, this is not just "any death." This is an assassination, pure and simple. This is homegrown domestic terrorism, and I hope it's prosecuted as such. The entire country should be up in arms about this, and I hope every fucking wackjob who wants to roll back civil rights in the name of fighting terrorism gets on board with prosecuting the people responsible for this act.

That won't happen, of course. Torture un-tried prisoners for information? Sure! Condemn a domestic terrorist who also happens to be Christian and anti-abortion? Yeah. Don't hold your breath.

What a horrible day.

Where will the women who would otherwise die or whose children would suffer in unimaginable ways go? I guess they're just going to have to die.

If they are rich, they'll go abroad. If they're not rich, the anti-choice folk (who IIRC actually make up a proportionately large percentage of women seeking terminations) don't care.

This is why I don't get involved in the politics around abortion. Because it's so easy to fall into that kind of rhetoric. Not every pro-lifer believes what Terry and Bauer and Father T do--in fact, I'd say very few do--but it's all too easy, when inside a movement, to pick up the attitudes of the leaders. Besides, the political arena is never where the issue will be settled, if it gets settled at all. Which I doubt very much it ever will be, and frankly, I kind of think it's better that way. It's not an issue anyone ought to be easy with.

I hate this kind of thing not just because it's a horrible perversion of Christian beliefs, but because it causes anyone who's pro-life to be viewed with suspicion. Not everyone who's pro-life is for violence against abortion doctors. Not everyone who's pro-life is a hypocrite. Not everyone who's pro-life is anti-woman. While I feel vaguely sick at the whole idea of abortion, I also understand why it's sometimes necessary, and why some women feel that it's what they have to do. If I found out I was carrying a baby with harlequin ichthyosis (my personal nightmare), chances are I'd feel it was necessary. In a perfect world, it wouldn't be an issue, but this is the world we live in.

I hate the label of "pro-life" because -- by your own admission, you do agree that it is sometimes better to end a pregnancy than bear a child whose life would be nothing but suffering. What you are, it sounds like, is against abortion as a replacement for birth control.

The truth is, NOBODY is "Pro-Abortion." Nobody.

And the problem is, if people who feel as you do (and as most pro-choice folks do, in act) stay silent, the only voices heard are those of the extremists, and, as you say, it's easier to follow the leader than to say, "Wait one damned minute, murder is not 'pro-life.'"

Abortion should be safe, legal, and rare. And the more information on birth-control and protection against STDs is available, the fewer abortions will be necessary---no matter how you define "necessary."

Howard Dean reduced abortions in Vermont by 45%... by education. There is no reason that model can't be followed if people of good will stand up against the extremists and support sex education.

Your voice is needed. It's damned uncomfortable, but the alternative is to let those murdering maniacs speak for you.

"Pro-life" is a misnomer.

harmonyfb.livejournal.com - 2009-06-01 15:57 (UTC) - Expand

ETA: I knew it. I knew it. I totaly called Operation Rescue bobbing up in Dr. Tillman's murder like a bloated corpse.

Heh, it was my first thought too. I know these people like you know them.

I've been very lucky. I got pregnant when I wanted to, and both pregnancies were normal, and produced high-test kids.

I'm almost alone in that among the women I know I'm nearly unique. I've known women who conceived while on the pill, on IUDs, whose tubal ligations failed, who were guaranteed that they were sterile and then surprised when they weren't, who were raped and conceived. Worst, I've known the women Dr. Tillman served best: married women whose planned-for and much desired pregnancies went terribly wrong. Late term abortions are always tragedies; Randall Terry and his ilk are monsters for portraying them as anything but.

I'm just old enough to remember women who died after backalley abortions. I've been pro-choice since before I was able to get pregnant, because an older friend was impregnated by her father and was stuck with the pregnancy, childbirth, and raising her daughter/sibling.

I want to communicate all the pain these women have felt to anyone who cannot understand just what an essential thing it is for women to be able to take action to control their lives and make decisions for themselves and their children when things go wrong.

Julia, wishing women who have had abortions felt safe enough to comunicate their stories more often.

Unfortunately, these muckers do not care about the women. It says in the bible that women should suffer during childbirth, which mutates into any woman who is sexually active deserves to suffer... just more patriarchal mysogyny.

I'd sentence that murdering bastard to a life sentence as an orderly in a hospital ward caring for children born to women who might have terminated their pregnancies: AIDS, fetal-alcohol, and some of the more horrible birth defects. Make him walk his talk.

I hadn't heard about this killing, actually, and I am stunned. I'm reading the ontd_political posts right now. Until I'm finished with that, all I can really say is that your post was very interesting and well-written and I thank you sincerely for posting it here for everyone to read.

I'd like to follow this up now by letting you know that I've been reading about this whole mess for the past 3 hours now.

I don't really have any words that could adequately express my feelings but I'm filled with so much shame and sadness for the way my countrymen have acted and continue to act. I feel so utterly ill and sad.

At the same time I feel more grateful than ever that I do still have a choice available to me should I ever need it. I'm grateful that even though I attended a Christian school and church for a fair chunk of my youth I was never taught such cruel things. I'm grateful that I was raised by strong, independent women who encouraged me to be strong and independent too.

Thank you again for this post.

Not much to say about the issue at hand (really, what is there to say? Other than "sonuvabitch" and maybe "humans can be icky sometimes"), but I would like to thank you for making me realize just how awesome the Catholics I used to hang out with were (still are - we've transferred to different universities and lost track, but I doubt they've changed much over the last year). There was a whole (okay, kinda small) crowd of them, whose personal beliefs were "when in doubt, go with the Pope," but were also aware that y'know? They could be wrong. And thinking that something was maybe not the best choice for a person to make wasn't a deal-breaker when it came down to respecting or even befriending that person. I've shared pro-gay rights picket lines with these people. And until just now, I'd taken their awesomeness for granted. So, thank you for making me remember that my friends are part of a rare breed. <3

I remember being in my first Women's Studies class in college in the late 80's, and being absolutely shocked and horrified to find out the things that were done to women when abortion was illegal. I never knew anything about it before then, because I had been raised in a liberal community and household, and was taught that choice is what America is all about. The most basic choice -- control of your body. And you are right, I don't know anybody who's running around cheering "Abortions for Everyone! YAY!" but the alternative is NO CHOICE and that is infinitely worse.

Whenever the local nutbags protest at our Planned Parenthood, I want to make up some posters of dead women lying on the floor in oceans of their own blood and see how they PRO LIFE they find that. I bet they'd say it was payback for her sin or some other nonsense.

I'm sorry, I'm starting to get really angry again. I can't talk about this abomination anymore. This SUPREME hypocrisy. ARGH.

Both my brother and my father fall in the mushy middle, I think. Don't like it. Don't approve. But then again, they're not women, so what the hell do they know? So, let's throw in "it should stay legal" and leave it at that.

Heh. It's feels like a cop-out, but this is generally how I feel. I'm Jewish, and my opinion on the subject is heavily influenced by my upbringing and a culture where it seems like every decision, large or small, is sort of expected to be the product of agonized reflection. So you generally have to assume that if someone is going in for this, that they're not making the decision lightly and probably know what they're doing. Not that it's for me to judge, anyway.

But then, in the Jewish religion a fetus is viewed as having the potential for life rather than actually being a person. Sacred and vital to preserve, but not the same absolute case as other faiths hold. Again, not that - in a pluralistic society - we'd try to impose that position. Which is why it's a terribly messy political issue for the state to have to insert itself into.

This post was very powerful. Thank you.

Thank you for posting this.

Thank you for this post. You've summed up everything that I want to say so much better than I ever could.

I am pro-choice because it's none of my business what other women do. When I found myself unexpectedly pregnant last year, I chose to go through with the pregnancy and do not regret having my daughter. If it ever happened again, because of my age and overall health, I would probably choose abortion. Like you said, either way, choice is always going to be involved.

Oh, look, another reason why I think you're awesome: This whole post.

Here via

innerbrat. As another former Catholic School girl who used to be anti-abortion: yes, exactly, and thank you for saying it better than I could.

I am pro-life. That label has gotten a very bad name from people like Operation Rescue. I am 100 percent for medically necessary or even medically recommended abortions being available to any woman who needs them. After a long personal struggle on the issue, I can't even stand against general legalized abortions.

How then can I say I'm pro-life? Because I think the proper way to reduce the number of abortions is to offer positive alternatives. Don't do it or we'll harass and threaten you is the world's stupidest strategy. Things like this http://www.mmhome.org/ is, I believe the proper response. Organizations that take in women facing an incredibly scary situation and give them support and help.

I mourn with you for Dr. Tillman. Not only because senseless death is to be mourned but that damnable idiots like the one who killed him make everyone who claims a pro-life stance appear to be a raving, violent lunatic. Some of us are actual, caring human beings.

The basic pro-life "theme" is that any abortion at all is wrong, and people shouldn't have a choice at ALL. "Pro-choice" is that you should be allowed to CHOOSE whether you end your pregnancy. Therefore, being pro-life means you think YOU have the right to decide to end or not end someone's pregnancy.

Which is what you are doing, by "offering" an "only in the case" clause.

Edited 2009-06-01 14:40 (UTC)

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