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Dear Random Stranger from Linked-In...
I have a professional profile on Linked-In, primarily because I need some kind of online profile for my RL identity.
[I should note that ol' Lizbeth Marcs, my nom de Internet, has an online identity going back to Usenet days. My RL identity? Is barely a blip.]
In any case, this random person who I do not know, have never heard of, and lives nowhere near my geographic location randomly emailed me for "career advice" about becoming a technical-medical type-writer in a poorly worded, bad-grammar email several days ago. I should also mention that this individual is a recent graduate with a PhD.
Aaaaand that's all I know about him. Nothing else.
Now, as it so happens, I've, y'know, been just a tad busy between a tight deadline at work and the 'rents health issues and trying to get my life in order because I've been busy between work and the 'rents. I was planning on responding to him when I had the damn time to put together a thoughtful response, starting with, "I honestly can't give you any advice, except maybe you need to really improve your basic writing skills."
Of course, I was going to be more polite than that, but wording that kind of criticism takes some thought.
Well, not even a week goes by and I get a "Seeking Career Advice: 2nd Message" from the same guy. Yes. He actually titled it "2nd Message."
To make matters even worse, "2nd Message" is worded exactly the same as the first. No changes. At all. Just word-for-word the same message, like he couldn't be bothered to do more than just hit "send."
Allow me a moment to wham my head against a desktop.
Look, I understand the economy is scary, scary, scary out there. I do. I even sympathize. I doubly sympathize if you just graduated with an advanced degree and are facing the very real prospect that your first job will be flipping burgers at McDonald's while those ol' college bills just pile up the interest.
But if you're randomly reaching out to people on the internet for advice and help, people you don't know and have never so much as exchanged an email with before this very moment, maybe waiting at least a week or week-and-a-half might be a good idea? Especially when, geographically speaking, you live nowhere near the person you're emailing and aren't likely to ever interact with that person again once you get what you want.
Here's a pro-tip:
People have RL things they've got to do and sometimes they can't actually go check that email address or site they've set aside for professional real-life things. And, yes, a week may in fact go by before they do manage to check either one of these. Sometimes people are so busy at work because they're doing the job of 2.5 people because of a hiring freeze. Sometimes they're juggling both these things, and as a result they're so far behind that they'll never catch up.
It isn't that people (like me) aren't willing. It's just that some of us (like me) would like to sit down and think about our response before shooting an email off to you, but before we do that we have to carve out the time to do it. Please refer to the paragraph above this one for the myriad of ways our time may be in short supply.
And I should add: I am not human resources person or a corporate recruiter or a career coach. No one is paying me to vet your resume or tell you where the jobs are. No one is giving me the spare time I need to give you "tips and tricks" to landing you your dream job. If I do it, it's out of the goodness of my heart and because I carved out enough spare time to help you.
Sending me a "2nd Message," with that heading no less, and without bothering to change the wording of your request to reflect that this is, in fact, the second time you've pinged me, is not making me inclined to help you. At all.
And just because it's worth mentioning one more time: It would help if your email was actually written well using good grammar and was at least a little formatted to make it easier to read. I'm not talking about anything big here. A line space between paragraphs would be an excellent start.
What I'm saying is: If you can't put one iota of effort in your attempts to ask me for help, not even to slightly reword your request for that "2nd Message," why should I put any effort into helping you?
Furthermore, if I knew anyone who was hiring, I'd pass the information on to people I know and trust. In fact, I have done this in the recent past. It was just my bad luck that over the past 6 months when I've done this, said companies (including mine) instituted a hiring freeze in the middle of the interview-resume review process.
I don't even know you, you random emailer you.
And, oh, by the way, I did respond to an email from a job seeker. Just before I received yours, in fact. He sent me one email. One. It took me 2 weeks before I could get to it, but I did get to it. I couldn't help him much, sorry to say.
But here's the thing: his request was polite, well-written, he acknowledged that we didn't know each other, he explained where he got my name, and the email had basic formatting so it was easy to read.
Funny thing is, I didn't realize how important those tiny things were when a complete stranger pings you for help, but as it turns out, they kind of ARE important.
Look, I'm not expecting someone to slobber all over me when pinging me because of some professional network-y type thing. I'm really not.
In fact, if I know you and we've at least had minimal interaction, I'm more than willing to do anything I can to help on the job front (and there's several people here on LJ who'll back up that assertion). Hell, if I know you, you probably don't even need to say "please."
But if I don't know you, I'm thinking that, saying "please" and making your email easy for me to scan should be the minimum requirement. And to actually send me a "2nd message" without bothering to re-word said message in any way? And to send your "2nd Message" mere days after you sent the first one? Can you say entitlement? Can you say, "You're actually making it less likely that I'll help you?"
RAAAGGGHHHH!
Sorry for the rant. It's just that I know so many people who are getting their assess kicked because of the economy — either because they're unemployed, underemployed, or overemployed (because they're doing more than one job at work) — but who manage to at least adhere to the minimum of netiquette and etiquette.
Then this little twit....
*grumble growl snarl*
It really set me off.
ETA: Ooops. It set me off more than I thought, because I did email Mr. Entitlement a shorter version of the above rant.
[I should note that ol' Lizbeth Marcs, my nom de Internet, has an online identity going back to Usenet days. My RL identity? Is barely a blip.]
In any case, this random person who I do not know, have never heard of, and lives nowhere near my geographic location randomly emailed me for "career advice" about becoming a technical-medical type-writer in a poorly worded, bad-grammar email several days ago. I should also mention that this individual is a recent graduate with a PhD.
Aaaaand that's all I know about him. Nothing else.
Now, as it so happens, I've, y'know, been just a tad busy between a tight deadline at work and the 'rents health issues and trying to get my life in order because I've been busy between work and the 'rents. I was planning on responding to him when I had the damn time to put together a thoughtful response, starting with, "I honestly can't give you any advice, except maybe you need to really improve your basic writing skills."
Of course, I was going to be more polite than that, but wording that kind of criticism takes some thought.
Well, not even a week goes by and I get a "Seeking Career Advice: 2nd Message" from the same guy. Yes. He actually titled it "2nd Message."
To make matters even worse, "2nd Message" is worded exactly the same as the first. No changes. At all. Just word-for-word the same message, like he couldn't be bothered to do more than just hit "send."
Allow me a moment to wham my head against a desktop.
Look, I understand the economy is scary, scary, scary out there. I do. I even sympathize. I doubly sympathize if you just graduated with an advanced degree and are facing the very real prospect that your first job will be flipping burgers at McDonald's while those ol' college bills just pile up the interest.
But if you're randomly reaching out to people on the internet for advice and help, people you don't know and have never so much as exchanged an email with before this very moment, maybe waiting at least a week or week-and-a-half might be a good idea? Especially when, geographically speaking, you live nowhere near the person you're emailing and aren't likely to ever interact with that person again once you get what you want.
Here's a pro-tip:
People have RL things they've got to do and sometimes they can't actually go check that email address or site they've set aside for professional real-life things. And, yes, a week may in fact go by before they do manage to check either one of these. Sometimes people are so busy at work because they're doing the job of 2.5 people because of a hiring freeze. Sometimes they're juggling both these things, and as a result they're so far behind that they'll never catch up.
It isn't that people (like me) aren't willing. It's just that some of us (like me) would like to sit down and think about our response before shooting an email off to you, but before we do that we have to carve out the time to do it. Please refer to the paragraph above this one for the myriad of ways our time may be in short supply.
And I should add: I am not human resources person or a corporate recruiter or a career coach. No one is paying me to vet your resume or tell you where the jobs are. No one is giving me the spare time I need to give you "tips and tricks" to landing you your dream job. If I do it, it's out of the goodness of my heart and because I carved out enough spare time to help you.
Sending me a "2nd Message," with that heading no less, and without bothering to change the wording of your request to reflect that this is, in fact, the second time you've pinged me, is not making me inclined to help you. At all.
And just because it's worth mentioning one more time: It would help if your email was actually written well using good grammar and was at least a little formatted to make it easier to read. I'm not talking about anything big here. A line space between paragraphs would be an excellent start.
What I'm saying is: If you can't put one iota of effort in your attempts to ask me for help, not even to slightly reword your request for that "2nd Message," why should I put any effort into helping you?
Furthermore, if I knew anyone who was hiring, I'd pass the information on to people I know and trust. In fact, I have done this in the recent past. It was just my bad luck that over the past 6 months when I've done this, said companies (including mine) instituted a hiring freeze in the middle of the interview-resume review process.
I don't even know you, you random emailer you.
And, oh, by the way, I did respond to an email from a job seeker. Just before I received yours, in fact. He sent me one email. One. It took me 2 weeks before I could get to it, but I did get to it. I couldn't help him much, sorry to say.
But here's the thing: his request was polite, well-written, he acknowledged that we didn't know each other, he explained where he got my name, and the email had basic formatting so it was easy to read.
Funny thing is, I didn't realize how important those tiny things were when a complete stranger pings you for help, but as it turns out, they kind of ARE important.
Look, I'm not expecting someone to slobber all over me when pinging me because of some professional network-y type thing. I'm really not.
In fact, if I know you and we've at least had minimal interaction, I'm more than willing to do anything I can to help on the job front (and there's several people here on LJ who'll back up that assertion). Hell, if I know you, you probably don't even need to say "please."
But if I don't know you, I'm thinking that, saying "please" and making your email easy for me to scan should be the minimum requirement. And to actually send me a "2nd message" without bothering to re-word said message in any way? And to send your "2nd Message" mere days after you sent the first one? Can you say entitlement? Can you say, "You're actually making it less likely that I'll help you?"
RAAAGGGHHHH!
Sorry for the rant. It's just that I know so many people who are getting their assess kicked because of the economy — either because they're unemployed, underemployed, or overemployed (because they're doing more than one job at work) — but who manage to at least adhere to the minimum of netiquette and etiquette.
Then this little twit....
*grumble growl snarl*
It really set me off.
ETA: Ooops. It set me off more than I thought, because I did email Mr. Entitlement a shorter version of the above rant.
My response if I'd received that second message
Re: My response if I'd received that second message
Instead, I'll probably just ignore the fucker.
Re: My response if I'd received that second message
Maybe a terse e-mail explaining the fact that if he's going to be so demanding of your time he can pay you for it.
The response I did send...
Here's the email I did send:
Wow. I guess I'm a little mad, hunh?
Re: The response I did send...
I think that's kind of perfect.
Re: The response I did send...
Re: The response I did send...
-- hendrik
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It's amazing, isn't it? I got an email from some guy who said he saw I wrote gay romance, and spent a page telling me about himself and his story about somebody in a foreign country "with lots of colorful details" that would make a great film. Oh, and it was about a het guy, and didn't I think that sounded great?
Eh??
I wrote back saying, sorry, I only crit unpublished fic for a few trusted friends and did not want to see his his manuscript. Suggested a couple of writers groups.
Next day: Same guy. Doesn't have a story actually, y'know, written, he wants to tell me the story and I can write it for him.
Responded no, thank you, I am working to a deadline, have other commmitments, do not enjoy collaboration, would never try it with a stranger. Please look at writing groups and ask for a collaborator.
NEXT EFFING DAY: No, he doesn't want anything (BS detector goes off like a klaxon), he just wants to give me the idea for this epic and I can reap all the benefits.
DEAR MR ENTITLEMENT: I have my own stories to tell, and have no time for or interest in telling yours. It's a lot of work to write, and if you want your story to be told, you will have to do the heavy lifting yourself or find a collaborator who DOES want to work with you.
Sigh.
He actually wrote and thanked me for clarifying. !!! Some folks, I guess, literally cannot detect a hint.
The idea of writing to a stranger with this sort of presumptuous twaddle is so overwhelmingly bone-headed that I can hardly believe anyone does it. If I send a note to a writer, it would be to say I enjoyed his/her book and hope s/he writes more. This 'here I am, do this for me' business...?? I used to read about this happening to writers, and thought they were making it up, but just about every writer I know has had at least a few of these letters. It's nearly always men, too.
Spam filter time.
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That's really kind of special, isn't it?
Why is it that the minute people realize that you write for a living, they invariably inform you of one of the following: 1) They writer, too! (Never published, but still a writer!) or 2) They've got this story they're willing to give to you for FREE if you write it.
*wham wham wham*
The worst part is when they ask for concrit, and then you take them at their word. That's when it gets really ugly.
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It's stunning, really.
I've learned to make my job sound a lot more complicated than it really is so they'll be unable to figure out what I actually do.
Which is too bad because I love describing my job like this: "I research and write a term paper every two weeks."
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I can understand pinging someone a second time, but wait more than a week before you do it! And at least vary the email a little bit.
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But the way this guy went about it was all wrong. I can't imagine how he thought anyone would take him seriously with the email he sent. It's a bit mystifying, really.
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What makes it worse is this guy was looking for advice on how to land a writing job. I mean, if that's your aim, you really need to show that you can actually write.
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Which is part of why I had no idea what to think or how to respond to the email.
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And I agree, the e-mail you sent was perfect. And it is good advice. He asked for it! Ha! Let us know if he writes back. (I doubt it, though.)
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I'm not getting that he was grateful for it, which is not surprising because my response had a bit of 'tude there.
The ironic thing is, it's probably the most useful advice he's going to get. It's certainly better than my initial instinct to just ignore him.
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I'm so sorry your dad's knee surgery didn't turn out as well as hoped. The one lady I know well who had it was glad she had done it, but she has had it done three times. Twice one knee, once the other. Recovery from this surgery appears to be a long term thing. I hope he is ultimately happy he did it as well.