liz_marcs | You're Such a Special Little Snowflake, It's a Wonder You Don't Melt in the Laundry Room...

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You're Such a Special Little Snowflake, It's a Wonder You Don't Melt in the Laundry Room...

So, I got up at the ass-crack of dawn to get my laundry done, because my other option was to go to a cookout this afternoon wearing dressy clothes.

In my defense, I'd been trying off and on over the past 4 days or so to get into the laundry room, but 'tis the season where people swap out the winter gear for the summer gear, so that means everyone is doing more laundry than usual.

Keep in mind, my laundry room serves 16 apartments, and it's got two washers and two driers. That's it. Most of the time, it's not a problem, but when "clothes swapping" season is in full swing, it bottlenecks like whoah!

Anyway, I figured that ass-crack of dawn on Sunday during a long weekend would be safe laundry-room wise.

Except not so much. One woman had beaten me and was loading her laundry into the washing machine. While I wasn't happy, if this woman had the gumption to get up even earlier than I did to hit the laundry room...well, good for her. I could wait.

Anyway, I came back a half-hour later (long enough for her wash to cycle through and for her to get to it), and lo and behold, I was faced with two quiet washing machines and no sign of said woman.

So, I grumbled and did the polite thing: I removed her laundry and tossed them into the open dryers.

I had just finished loading both washing machines (and I had two more batches to load after that because, y'know, sheets need to be cleaned and that's one batch right there) when the woman comes puffing into the laundry room all apologies and thanking me for putting her laundry in the dryer.

Awwwww. Nice of her, I thought.

Then I made the mistake of joking that I thought sure I'd be the only one in the laundry room, so I was a little surprised to see that I got beat to the dryers.

"Well, y'know," the woman says to me, "the people around here have a habit of hogging the washing machines. They'll just come in here with 4, 5, 6 loads of wash and do them one right after the other using both washing machines and both driers at the same time, with even more laundry waiting to go in."

Picture me trying not to look at my 4 loads of wash as I say the following: "There are a lot of families around, so it's not surprising that people have that much laundry on a regular basis. I mean, I have a lot of laundry because I've been trying to get in all week and haven't managed to catch the laundry room at a non-busy moment."

"So, you know. It's all these people who hog the machines," she says.

"It's not hogging the machines if they keep the laundry moving. Hogging the machines is when you let your laundry sit in washing machine or the drier a half-hour after it's done," says I. "And, hey, it's not like we have to lug laundry across town. We have to cross the street. Besides, you can always come back and do it tomorrow if you're behind someone with that much laundry. I've done it more than once."

"Well, they should let someone with less laundry go first instead of using all the machines when people are trying to get the laundry done," she tells me.

This surprised me so much that for a moment I was stunned. Then I asked, "If they were here first, why should they do that?"

This woman starts to glare at me. "Because it's rude to use up all the machines when people with less laundry need to wash their clothes."

"No it's not," I said. "They were here first, they should do their laundry first. Besides, it's not like they're less busy than we are. And like I said: We're right across the street. It's not like I'm going to run out of clothes if I have to wait a day or two."

"Maybe I'm not explaining myself well," I swear this woman sounds like she's trying to 'mansplain' something to me, "people who are doing more than 2 or 3 batches of clothes should leave one washer and dryer free so other people can use the machines."

"Except for the part where I've been in here doing 3 or more batches of wash and no one has so much as stuck their head in the laundry room, despite the fact 3 or 4 batches of wash takes 2 hours between washing and drying. So why should I leave a machine free, and nearly double my time in the laundry room, because someone might show up with a laundry basket? That doesn't make sense."

The woman starts staring at me as she realizes that I don't agree with her, despite the fact that I just told her that I had a shitload of laundry to do because I haven't been able to get near a machine all week due to the business of the laundry room.

She kind of huffs out of the laundry room after that.

Anyway, I'm utterly baffled. Where is this mysterious "laundry etiquette" coming from? As far as I know, "laundry etiquette" consists of making sure you take your clothes out of the washing machine/dryer when they're done and cleaning the lint trap in the dryer. Giving someone with less laundry "cutsies" even though they got there after you? Really?

I'm a veteran of shared laundry facilities, and I can't imagine walking up to someone who's already loading up a washing machine and demanding that I should go first because they I have less laundry to do. I mean, seriously? I've never even seen that. Ever.

I can just imagine how well this demand would go down in a busy laundromat (I'm thinking, "Not well.")

On what planet does "less laundry to do" trump "got to the washing machine first?"

Is this something new? Or was I just dealing with a special little snowflake?

I suspect "snowflake" is the correct answer here...

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Weird. I've always had my own washer/dryer, but your explanation makes a lot more sense. Sounds like this chick is conflating 'Grocery store etiquette' where you let someone with fewer items check out ahead of you, with using the facility.

Except grocery stores have an express lane for people with 14 items or less.

Also, maybe I'm weird, but even if I had 15 items, I'm not going to ask someone with a full basket in front of me if I can go first. I mean, I'm going to te grocery store, so standing in line is part of the deal.

What's really weird is that Snowflake was pushing 50. You'd think someone in that age range would get "first-come-first-served." I think I was so stunned because I'd more expect that from a college-age 20-something.

Huh. It's pretty common around here, even in the express lane. If I have the 14 items, and someone behind me has 2, I let them go ahead. Of course...the stores around here always only have two or three registers manned, the express lanes are only open during 'rush hour', and the self-checkouts are always broken.

I wouldn't allow someone with few items to wash them first either, but i must say the way you you told her your point of view was hilarious! Hopefully this won't happen to me, usually i use my own washer but it just got broken. I will have to go to the laundry room today, i have some urgent clothes to wash and i wouldn't want to wait too long. Anyways, i have already ordered some Kenmore parts (http://www.partstap.com/Kenmore-Parts.aspx) for my washer to get it fixed, so if i don't get to wash them i will just wait till tomorrow and use my washer.

The only time I've heard of that is in the grocery line, where someone with a billion items lets someone with one go in front of them. It's polite and saves that person waiting, but I can't imagine it in a laundry situation.

I have seen it in the grocery store, and it is nice when someone does offer, but I wouldn't go into a grocery store expecting it either. *shrug*

But, seriously, laundry is kind of a different matter. And like I said, it isn't like we have to get in a car and drive to the laundromat. The laundry room is right across the street.

You were getting snowed. I have never run across that version of a line-cut, in any of the places where I used shared laundry facilities.

Sounds like she's a bitter special little snowflake.

She's nuts. Someone could certainly let a person with less laundry go ahead of them, but it's like letting somebody into your lane even if they don't have right of way: nice to do, but not a requirement.

I agree. I can see circumstances in which I'd understand her POV -- like, if there were 3 washers and I had eight loads of laundry, and while I was putting the first two loads in, someone with one load of laundry came in, I'd probably offer to let them use one machine because it's not like it would make a big difference to ME. But other than in rare situations like that.

I agree with this. I've also been in a situation where I've gotten to the laundromat with my one laundry bag when a person with masses of laundry was in the middle of loading up all the machines, and they didn't offer me one, and it pissed me off. Not because offering me one was the expected thing to do, but because it would have been the considerate thing to do, and she didn't do it. :-)

In a laundry room w/ limited machines it's only polite I think to use them in a ration of 1:1. Using one machine and leaving one open for someone else. For example, there are four washer/dryer pairs in my building's laundry room. So the most loads I would do at a time would be two. During the day when everyone else is at work (I live in a mixed-use building) I might push it up to three loads but I would never use all four machines at the same time. If I needed to do that many, that quickly I'd drive to the laundromat instead.

It's not about "less laundry" or "more laundry" for me, it's about if you (proverbial you) had your own washer & dryer you'd only be doing one load at a time so don't so don't hog all the machines.

Morgan

I live in a building with one washer and dryer for 5 apartments. It's first come, first served here. I don't know of any specific laundry room protocol..beyond not leaving your washed or dried clothes in the machines for hours once they're done.
It's six of one, half dozen of another, isn't it? If you just used one machine to do four loads, you'd have it for four times as long as you would if you'd used all four machines, which kind of works out the same in the end.

OK, you just made me feel better about needing to replace the exhaust fan in the kitchen and 40 feet of siding and replace the shower plumbing in both bathrooms this summer. Oh, and take out the front door, mend a place the ants got in, and hang a new door. Because *I have my own washer and dryer* and nothing, nothing, would make me go back to using laundromats.

Julia, the laundry etiquette police reminds me of the person who castigated me for using the handicapped stall at an otherwise empty rest stop at 2am once (not to mention that I have panic disorder and claustrophobia and do so when I can to forestall the screaming crazies).

I get her point, even though when I've had shared laundry facilities, I act like you (and most people) do. I mean, on a rational level I do get that it's kind of rude and entitled to think that just because I got there first I deserve to be able to do my multiple loads in the least amount of time just because that is convenient to me. If it takes me more time because I've got a lot of loads-- well, that's what happens in my own home with my one set of machines anyway :) I can imagine there are people who have a single day where they can wash clothes and if someone is hogging the machines because it's their one day too- well, one person has to drive off site when an easy if not-as-convenient solution is just to leave a machine free.

That said, I believe most people would agree with you (and I have in the past) and first-come-first-serve is the predominant etiquette.

I'm kind of an agnostic about this issue. In my experience share laundry facilities are kind of survival of the quickest places, and them what gets there first get the machines. Personally if I had a huge swot of laundry and time to spare I wouldn't do it all in one run, maily because I hate doing huge swots of laundry all at once any way.

But, I notice she tied up both machines and thought that was okay. It's only other people who tie up both machines for a longer period of time then she thinks they should that are rude.

Huh.

Goes to kitchen and pats my washer/drier affectionately....

Ditto, except that to actually touch the thing would probably make it go wrong again so I'll do it metaphorically.

LOL. Well, I dunno if that's proper etiquette or not, but it's not the way I've ever used a laundry room. Been using laundromats for fifteen years now, and I PURPOSELY make sure to stagger my laundry such that I can start a load, transfer to driers to claim them, and then turn around and use the washers I just used so that I have a claim always staked on the driers I need.

Forget everyone else, I'm not going to spend three hours in a laundry room trying to snag a drier.

Two washers and two dryers for 28 units in my building. I don't take down more than two loads at a time. If my two washing loads are done and put into the dryers and no one else has left their laundry in the room to "save" the washers, then I go back up for more loads. If there is laundry left in the room waiting for the washing machines, I don't go back up to get more laundry so someone else has a turn.

My building has a ton of old people who get up at dawn for laundry. My best luck is after 8:00 PM. I dream about having in-unit laundry facilities someday.

I would let someone buying one item cut in line if I had a giant cart of groceries, sure. But laundry is not the same at all.

We have four washers and four dryers for I don't know how many apartments in a Cambridge apartment building. I do make a habit of doing two loads at a time unless I know it is a total dead time there so that there are two washers and dryers free because so many people are using that laundry room. I hate to take people's wash out of the dryer or washer so I try never to do that unless the person has left their stuff for five or more hours. The laundry room in twenty feet from door so not a big deal for me to run over and check.

I think you can leave off the snow. Seriously, what planet is she from?

Yes, she is a special little snowflake. Anyway, the problem is not people "hogging" the laundry facilities--it's not enough machines. Any chance of getting the building management to add a few machines?

--Willowgreen, who got so sick of the dirty laundry room and constantly broken machines in her old apartment building that she took to driving to a nearby laundromat instead.

In my last building I had the good fortune of being able to do laundry at 2 and 3 in the morning. Even so, I seriously do not miss communal laundry.

~M~

...and that got me thinking about doing laundry in Samoshel (http://www.opcc.net/tabid/86/Default.aspx)..

I've run into various people's odd definitions of "fair" over time. I've found that the more ridiculous the definition, the more tenaciously they cling to it.

In this particular case, you have a fairly "rare" resource, and the best thing for everyone is to make sure that resource is used most efficiently. In other words idle machine=bad thing. So, first, of course, do your best to get the laundry into the dryer as soon as possible after the wash, and second, if you have that much laundry, use all the machines.

Well, "both" the machines in this case. Any time you leave a machine unused is time you'll be taking away from someone else, later.

I mean, if there's a line for the room, I can sorta see being nice, and each pair of you taking one machine. But I've never seen a laundry room with a line.

It's been years (fortunately) since I've had to use a laundromat, but that gal is whacked. Maybe it's a regional thing... but the region is her head.

A while back a special snowflake dude thought he could block an entire checkout line with a huge cartful of groceries while he ran back for something. He actually had the nerve to say something to me when I put my stuff on the belt while he was gone.

laundry etiquette?

Well there is a form of copier etiquette in my office where if someone is copying about 300 sheets of paper or so and another person only needs one copy, you let the person get that one copy, then copy you're 300 pages.

However, I have never heard of that for washer/dryer machines.

My laundry sharing has been mostly limited to college dormitory settings and laundry mats. I've never heard of the idea of setting aside a machine for the possibility of a person with one load coming over and doing the "express lane" version of laundry. I'd rather have someone use all the machines they need and get done sooner, so that I can do likewise.

The thing that always drove people nuts were folks who didn't come back in a timely way to move their clothes from a washer to a dryer, or if in the dryer, to add money and dry longer, or take them out. Because, of course if you took their clothes out of the machine (particularly the dryer), they would show up 40 minutes later whining that their clothes were still damp and they wanted to dry them longer.

When I lived in halls I'd quite happily utilize both the washers in there if they were free simply because we had two washing machines between 140 odd students in the building. I usually only had about two-three loads a week though and depending on how busy I had been usually determined the amount of washing I had to get through. I did try and split it up between whites days, darks days and linens days but sometimes I would be so busy that I'd try and do it all at once. The etiquette where I was seemed to be no machine free, sigh and check when the machines cycles finish, return then.

That lady though, maybe she just doesn't have good patience

I admit, i hate when other people touch my laundry and I will always wait someone out if they leave their clothes in the dryer or the washing machine because of that. But that's me - I don't think it's rude if I'm late and someone's doing that, you know?

I generally use only one washer because the laundry room is basically right underneath my apartment. It's literally walk out my door and go down a short flight of steps. If it takes longer, well, that's more eps of law and order I can watch between loads. :) It's by no means etiquette, it's me being like, well, leave one for the other 31 apartments if they need it. Again, not etiquette, heh.

I think it is more mathematical than that. Consider someone with 6 loads getting in before someone with 1 load. The person with one load must now wait the equivalent time of 7 loads in order to receive 1 load. The person with six loads does 6 and gets 6. If the person washing 6 lets the person with 1 use a washer and drier, then that person has waited 7 to get 6. Yes, mathematically I consider letting the person with 1 load use a machine to be considerate.

Actually, all of her arguing can be whittled down to nine little words: Whatever works out best for me at the time.

If she had had four loads to do, I guarantee that she would have supported the other side of the argument. Because I think I know that woman! She explained work refrigerator etiquette to me one day as I tried to edge out of the room. (Short version: She can rearrange the fridge as needed. But anyone who touches her lunch box, even if just to make room for their own, must DIE!) I wound up contacting her manager and suggesting an anger management class might be in order. He sighed and said, "Tried that."

I never lived anywhere that tenants were expected to ration our use of the washers and dryers. Well, except for the two machines currently in my basement. My kids have been known to beg, "Pleeease, can I do the next load, or I'll have to go to school naked!" They get away with it because that's not a threat a mom can ignore. And at least they do their own laundry.

You're absolutely right. Laundry room courtesy means making sure your laundry doesn't sit in a machine that's not going. This woman you describe is delude.

I must ask, though, what the hell does "mansplain" mean. I've never heard the phrase. Google doesn't like it either. Needless to say, I'm curious.

I think it means, "You must not have understood me the first time, because if you did you would naturally agree with me, so I will explain it again and again and again until you--you rather stupid bint--finally understand me, and then you will agree with me."

Uh, that's clearly what it means in context. I'd like to know where she got the word from, though, and if it has more general meaning.

You knew I wasn't calling you a stupid bint, right? I was speaking in the voice of the man. I don't know where the term originates, but that is the way I have heard/seen it used in the past. Hopefully, Liz will chime in and tell us if she knows the origin.

I didn't even consider you might be insulting me until you brought it up. Sorry if my response made it seem that way. I was just trying to clarify on what I was asking because I didn't feel your reply answered my question.

But you've seen/heard it used before? Hmm. Maybe it's regional because google has gone from 0 pages found to 1 page found: the livejournal entry we're responding to. Intriguing.

I live in dorms with 1,500 other people, and a limited set of washers and even more limited set of dryers. It's not usually so much the washers that get me, because they operate on a fixed time, but people who insist on spreading their clothes out over many dryers, have few items in each dryer, and leaves them to dry for ages.

We don't have any sort of etiquette concerning it, though. First come, first served, and first done so others can play.

I could kind of see, if you had say 4 loads to do, and the first two were finishing in the washing cycle when someone walked in with one load you let them have one washer while you did load 3 in the other. Yes, it extends your time but I could see someone offering that. No way do you leave a washer free with no one waiting.

I was so ecstatic when I got an apartment with a washer/dryer in it I swore I would never go back to laundry rooms. Which probably tells you how much I am not the person to ask on laundry room etiquette.

Throw a cup of urine in her next dryer load.

It's been a while since I had to do the laundromat / laundry room thing, but I figure as long as you move your clothing in and out of the machines in as time-efficient a manner as possible, you're fine ettiquette-wise. When I was in college and we had 4 laundry rooms in my building - each with 8 pairs of machines (in a building that housed 1000 students), as long as I stayed away from peak hours I never had to go further than one wing over, and neither did anyone else. (We had a lot of pre-med students in my wing for some reason, so I'd usually do laundry while they were all in their chemistry lab courses and such in mid-afternoon).

The only time I ever had to 'wait' was when girls would leave their stuff in the machines - I will take a guy's stuff out of the machine if there is a table or a dryer available, but not a girl's, because I don't feel comfortable handling their underwear and I'm sure they wouldn't want me handling it either. And even then, it wouldn't be a problem unless all the machines were in use.

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You're Such a Special Little Snowflake, It's a Wonder You Don't Melt in the Laundry Room...

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