Definitely not tl;dr (an expression I had to look up. I am so un-hip.); quite the opposite, in fact. But then, I'm fascinated by what goes on behind the scenes with writing and story-telling.
I especially like the A-Ha! moment and the sudden shift in interpretation: what if he's not alive?. It's amazing sometimes how a little nudge can bring about a major shift in perception and let everything click into place.
OK, so confession time - I've never managed to get into the Buffy-verse (or LOTR, or D&D, or X-Men, or Harry Potter. Seems to be something deep in the way I'm wired.), so given that I don't know half the characters you mention, let alone the physics of that particular world, I suspect an awful lot in the story would just whoosh over my head.
I did read the first part, though, because I wanted to see what you'd done with the second-person. (Confession 2: a story written in 2nd-person typically alienates me to the point of abandoning it after the first paragraph, a visceral "stop trying to tell me what I'm thinking and feeling" reaction.) Well, it didn't put me off; in fact, it did manage to convey the pace and urgency of Xander's situation quite well. Have you ever tried writing 1st or 2nd PoV without using 1st or 2nd person pronouns (outside dialog)? It's a bit of a pig to do, but also very immediate and intimate.
Anyway, thanks again for taking the time to lift the curtains. It's been thought-provoking.
Thanks for the meta
I especially like the A-Ha! moment and the sudden shift in interpretation: what if he's not alive?. It's amazing sometimes how a little nudge can bring about a major shift in perception and let everything click into place.
OK, so confession time - I've never managed to get into the Buffy-verse (or LOTR, or D&D, or X-Men, or Harry Potter. Seems to be something deep in the way I'm wired.), so given that I don't know half the characters you mention, let alone the physics of that particular world, I suspect an awful lot in the story would just whoosh over my head.
I did read the first part, though, because I wanted to see what you'd done with the second-person. (Confession 2: a story written in 2nd-person typically alienates me to the point of abandoning it after the first paragraph, a visceral "stop trying to tell me what I'm thinking and feeling" reaction.) Well, it didn't put me off; in fact, it did manage to convey the pace and urgency of Xander's situation quite well. Have you ever tried writing 1st or 2nd PoV without using 1st or 2nd person pronouns (outside dialog)? It's a bit of a pig to do, but also very immediate and intimate.
Anyway, thanks again for taking the time to lift the curtains. It's been thought-provoking.